Without a computer...

During my 10 day holiday, I decided not to use the computer at all and see how much more I could read and write. Several things jumped at me immediately. I certainly could read more, have more time to spend with the books, etc. I could also write more using my Royal portable typewriter. I am not reverting back to pre-technology days, but it was a test of will not to turn on the computer for a week.

This is what happened:

1-I read "Rilke On Love and Other Difficulties"

2-I read "The Dream Life of Sukhanov" by Olga Grushin

3--I am in the middle of "The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins

Of Rilke I can only say it was a worth while read but strictly on an academic level. There are some fine passages from his letters and other writings. This was the first time I read some of his poetry. I quote here in the original German in honor of my literary benefactor and friend:

Wir sollen nicht wissen, warum

dieses und jenes uns meistert;

wirkliches Leben ist stumm,

nur daB es uns begeistert,

macht uns mit ihm vertraut

"The Dream Life of Sukhanov" went by so fast that I finished the book in 24 hours. I couldn't put it down. The first five or six paragraphs are hard to swallow--it's difficult to make out what's going on. Once things are settled, it is an enjoyable read. Sukhanov is the editor in chief of the premier art publication in the Soviet Union. He has everything he could ask for. Things begin to unravel when a friend from his past chances upon him. The toss up judgment that the reader eventually has to take is that of whether it was right for Sukhanov to give up his dreams for a comfortable career. He begins to justify his life by claiming that he did it all for others, not for personal gain. But the equation is not that simple. He "sells" out to the Soviet apparatchik, and his dream of being a cutting edge (albeit highly against Soviet policy) surrealist painter vanishes. I think there are some interesting devices here too. For example, the narrator point of view changes from third person to first person and then back. I think this works, insofar it helps Sukahnov explain his dilemma. It does get confusing at times so the reader must be alert to the change as it happens. This story is easily comparable to "The Death of Ivan Ilych" by Tolstoy.

I am reading Richard Dawkins "The God Delusion," but I am not commenting on it.

I found this old quote by Kafka in a scrap piece of paper hidden between the pages of one of my old books.

I am nothing but literature and can and want

to be nothing else.... A writer's life actually

does depend on his desk; if he is to avoid going

mad, really he should never leave his desk, he

must cling to it like grim death.... I want to delve

into it with all my strength; when not writing I feel

myself being pushed out of life by unyielding hands. -- Franz Kafka.

Rilke and the God Delusion

I am almost finished with "Letter to a Young Poet." The second part of the book (the edition that I am using) is a chronicle of the life of Rainer Maria Rilke. It plays as a concordance to the letters he wrote Franz Kappus (the young poet in question) and it goes to show that, to a large extent, Rilke was suffering from the same doubts, joys, sadness, crushes, exhilarations that Kappus was confessing in his own letters. The "chronicles" bring Rilke's life to a larger picture... I just never knew there was so much to his writing and scholarly life beyond the letters.

I am reading an article I printed out of the New York Times yesterday. It is called "Darwin's God" and it deals with the advent of neo-atheism and other polemics of belief/non-belief. The article exposes the idea that rather than concentrating in the argument of belief vs. non-belief, there is an inherent evolutionary trait in human beings that biologically incline us to believe in something beyond. One of the philosophers in question is a man named Scott Atran. The article also mentions Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris and Daniel Dennett, three of the leading neo-atheists who have come up with recent publications about the polemic. The most famous of the three is "The God Delusion" by Dawkins. The article in the New York Times doesn't really claim the idea of non-belief but it is rather an examination at the biology of belief. Is there a gene that has evolved over time to make us inclined to believe in God? It's an interesting article. You can find it here.

Rainer Maria Rilke's Letters

"Letters to a Young Poet" has to be the most exacting use of language in modern history. I know that is a huge hyperbole, but I can't help it when everything I am reading presently leaves me breathless. Rilke writes about so many topics using such exactitude of language that it is really a disservice to try and comment on it here. It simply cannot be more perfect than it already is. We have all asked ourselves whether or not we have anything important to say with our writing. Should we write? Why write? Rilke's take on it is simply classic: "There is only one single way. Go into yourself. Search for the reason that bids you write; find out whether it is spreading out its roots in the deepest places of your heart; acknowledge to yourself whether you would have to die if it were denied you to write. This above all--ask yourself in the stillest hour of your night; must I write?" And a thousand other things that are so captivating it is nearly impossible to wonder how could someone have such an insight into life and be able to convey it in beautiful language.

These letters, written to Franz Kappus, deal with so much more than mere art. Rilke writes about the importance of introspection: "Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answers. Perhaps you do carry within yourself the possibility of shaping and forming as a particularly happy and pure way of living; train yourself to it--but take whatever comes with great trust, and if only it comes out of your own will, out of some need of your inmost being, take it upon yourself and hate nothing." Marvelous advice, really. There are so many things to reflect on that the mere 154 pages go by in a flash. Going back to the earlier passage, I have long debated whether or not I should write. I once wrote an essay titled "Why I don't Write." It was simply an examination as to who can claim the title of writer. I didn't come up with any definite answer, but the essay made me reflect on more than one aspect of the viral way in which writers operate and to which I cannot claim hold of.

I think Rilke was a great decision to re-read. I am underlining the most moving passages and will continue to post as I see fit. If you've never read the "Letters," I strongly encourage you to do so as soon as possible. Life seems so much fuller because of them.